Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Where is an unfortunate tendency on the part of the whole human race to rush things that we delight in most. If it's good, we want it right now or, better still, yesterday. Some of life's very best stuff is stuff we want to have, handle, and hold quick, fast and in a hurry. We go to Christmas parties in November, we much popcorn that takes only seconds to pop, we rush to wear today what we can't pay for until next year. Love is a good thing, and if you're not careful, it too will become a rushed thing. Take your time.
At every stage of a love relationship with a person, you'll need to work hard to avoid "microwave madness," the frantic rush to meet "him or her" today and get to the "happily ever after" part by tomorrow. Slow down. Give them, yourself, and your relationship the chance to develop deeper roots, and a sturdier foundation than can be produced overnight.
This is no call to procrastinate, meander, or retreat. Unnecessary delay is not your friend. Don't stop any positive forward movement, but don't rush so much that you miss all the sweet, progressive steps along the way, speeding to the finish line.
You are rushing way too fast f you spend more time worrying about how long the kind of love you want is taking than enjoying the kind of love you already have.
Don't be alarmed of Mr. or Mrs. Right didn't jet into your life today. Maybe he or she is on the way by boat, or bus, or bike. Be patient.
Don't lose our calm if head-over-heels love didn't bloom this season, or if rebuilding a fallen love takes more than a day, a week, or a month.
Decide you will slow down and wait. Don't get obsessed with arrival at the destination, savor the thrill of the ride.
Say it: "A deep, rich, satisfying love that can be counted on to endure is what I want. It's not available in instant, ready-mixed, or quick-drying forms. I can, I will, I must slow down."
Do it: Identify the area of your love life about which you have the most anxiety and the biggest tendency to rush. List on paper the fear (s) you have that tempt you to rush. For a week or longer, set a specific time of the day to worry about that. Worry then and there only. Outside of that time, force yourself to slow down and be calm about it.---Ronn Elmore