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Thursday, October 29, 2009

Sexual Sins and Staying Pure

Many of us struggle with sexual morality. Lets face it, staying sexually pure is one of the hardest things to do even for Christians. Statistics show that just as many Christians commit adultery or have premarital sex just as often as non believers. Many feel that it is impossible to stay pure in the eyes of God, and thats because it is-without God at least. God gives us the strength to do all things and we need to take advantage of this strength and self control that comes with our relationship with Jesus.

The bible warns us that any sin that you commit is against someone else except for sexual sins. Think about it. If you murder somebody, steal something, lie, or cheat you are sinning against another human. However if you lets say have sex before marriage then you have sinned against your own body. You have to deal with the pain and guilt of the fact that you took away your own purity. Also you may have had a child out of wedlock, or caught an STD. Now that definitely cannot happen from stealing.

The key is to ask God for self control. When you you do this, the Holy Spirit will give you what you need to stay pure. Nobody can do it alone, But with the Lord on your side, you can do anything, and you won’t end up sinning against yourself.

Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body.
1 Corinthians 6:18

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Banish The Bogeymen

Fears can bear a strong resemblance to that bogeyman under your bed that you used t worry about as a child-more shadow than substance, and more daunting for remaining unexamined. If you don't take positive steps to address them, fears can become a frequent or constant presence in your life and love.

Are you afraid of what's going to happen wit that big debt you and your partner have incurred? Do you worry about the health issues that you're observing in your parents and the potential ramifications might discover you're a phony in one way or another? All of these are real fears that may or may not be justified, but toting them around like an old backpack only gets you stressed and unhappy.

Before you can do anything constructive about a fear, you have to admit that it's there and give it a name. In the case of the unpaid debt, for example, are you afraid of losing everything and being ejected from house and home by debt collectors? Are you afraid of what the debt reveals about your or your partner's judgment or ability to provide? Perhaps you're afraid that others will find out that you don't have any financial substance. Giving your fear its true name is an essential step in getting beyond it.

Once you've seen the face of your bogeyman, it's possible to do something about it. In some cases, particularly when your fear has concrete sources, the next best step is to play out the possible scenarios and get further information. What are the bankruptcy laws in your state? Are there steps you can take now that will help you consolidate your debts? Suppose your friends find out. What do you honestly expect them to think or do? Do you really care about friends who would judge you for this.

Some fears have no real answers. Your father has a disease that has been shown to be hereditary in some cases. You fear that you may contract the disease, as well. Perhaps your fear can be allayed through more information, testing, or positive action. Facing the possibility of disability in the future with your partner and making contingency plans may help. In some cases, you may simply have to recognize that you don't know what will happen and choose to live fully and joyfully in the present.

There are frightening possibilities and uncertainties in every human life. We can live bondage to those fears, or we can face them, let them go, and make the most of every day that we're given.---Richard Carlson

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Release and Restore: Forgiveness in Relationshipsl

Have you ever given up on a relationship or noticed a difference in the way you connect with friends or your spouse because of an inability to get over past hurts and offenses? You have probably heard the saying "forgive and forget," but to someone who is upset after a challenging period in a friendship or marriage, this is often easier said than done. Many individuals use this phrase but do not understand the importance of its meaning to both the vitality of a relationship, and an individual's spiritual walk.

Unforgiveness and a refusal to let go of past hurts can haunt you for years. Imagine carrying around the fact that someone from your tenth–grade class embarrassed you in front of the entire school. Or, what if you find yourself having an "attitude" with your in–laws because you haven't gotten along in the past? Holding on to these types of situations actually hurt you more than they do the other person. It won't benefit you to remain angry with someone, instead, release the situation to God.

Relationships experience challenging times, but don't accept defeat by holding grudges and not releasing situations and people who have hurt you. Not only that, but the Word commands you to forgive others; it is a vital part of your spiritual walk. Matthew 6:14, 15 says, "For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." God wants you to have every opportunity to receive His blessings and when you need it, His forgiveness. Don't block God's ability to do great things in your life because you find it hard to forgive someone else.
In the process of releasing past offenses, it is important to go beyond your feelings. Forgiveness isn't a feeling, it is something that you do by faith because in your emotions, you may not feel as if you have forgiven the person. However, don't let anything keep you from forgiving and forgetting. If you are a Christian, purposing to have a forgiving heart is a quality decision that you must make. Eventually, it should become second nature because it shows your respect and love for God and others.

Remember that you can always turn to God for help where your hurt feelings are concerned. Just as you would pray to Him for stability in your finances or peace in your home, pray to Him about the hurt that you feel. God is capable of not only healing your spirit of hurt and frustration, but He can also restore your relationships. He wants to see you make the effort to respond according to His Word—in love.

Forgiveness is necessary when attempting to build and strengthen relationships. Everyone, including you, makes mistakes and the act of forgiveness in itself is a relationship strengthener. Do not condemn yourself for finding it difficult to forgive, but know that every step you take toward walking in forgiveness demonstrates growth and maturity.

Your attitude is what can make the difference when it comes to repairing relationships that go through turbulent times. The urge to argue with someone who has wronged you or continue heated discussions only serves the purpose of keeping your focus on the negative. Nothing is accomplished by seeking to have the last word in an argument; it only satisfies your flesh. Oftentimes, in the aftermath of expressing how you really feel, more damage has been done and both you and the other person walk away with more negative emotions. On the flip side, communicating your thoughts and feelings in a positive way can provide a means for understanding, healing and forgiveness.

Don't live your life carrying around the burden of unforgiveness. Instead, sincerely let go of those things that have hurt you and make a decision in your heart to move forward. Break the cycle of being hurt and holding grudges by making a decision to resolve and release conflict, pain and anger. Decide never to revisit the issues. Instead of focusing on another person's faults, focus on how you can restore the relationship. Allow the Word of God to become your final authority and use it as a tool to bring healing and restoration in your life and in the lives of others.
Be sure to take advantage of the unlimited resources available via the Online Bookstore and Bible Study Center. You will find a wealth of information to help you grow spiritually and strengthen your walk with God.

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Monday, October 19, 2009

Girl Signs Of Flirting

Written by a guy

Recognizing signs of flirting from Christian single gals is an important skill to master if you’re a guy are interested in dating. One clueless single Christan guy (every church has a few) told me he didn’t think he needed to know the signs of flirting because he didn’t think Christian girls flirted. Yeah, okay.

Girl Signs of Flirting
Since most gals give subtle signs of flirting, it’s important for a guy, especially if they’re love shy or lacking in confidence, to know he has a fighting chance of dating them, and not face rejection. Quite frankly, the fragile male ego would have a hard time with this.

Analyzing Signs of Flirting
Men, the following signs of flirting will help you how to tell if a girl is flirting with you. However, there are a few flirting tip disclaimers here.First, they taught us in seminary never to build a theology based on one Bible verse. Likewise, great care needs to be taken here not to get too excited when you observe just one sign of flirting in a woman. What are we saying? These signs of flirting should be looked at cumulatively.Secondly, make observe how the single girl of interest treats other men around her. If she treats everyone the same way, she may just have a flirtatious personality, and not necessarily have any special feelings for you.

Top Signs of Flirting
Well, without further ado, here are some of the top signs of flirting some of our readers have come up with:

Sign of Flirting #1:
She repeatedly glances in your direction
Say your in a christian singles group. Is she looking your way every time you take a peek her way? Prolonged eye contact is a pretty strong sign of flirting. Just look behind you to make sure she’s not spying some other hunk sitting right behind you!

Sign of Flirting #2:
She goes out of her way to “bump” into you
My one friend met his wife this way. She always found a way to cross paths with him, even if she had no reason to be in area.

Sign of Flirting #3:
You keep seeing that smiling face
If a girl is frequently smiling at you , it’s a good indication that she enjoys hanging around. Smiling back at her will disarm any fear she may have about pursuing the matter.

Sign of flirting #4:
She laughs at your stupid jokes
This is a good indication you have her interest, but just go easy on the one liners.

Sign of Flirting #5:
She approaches you in conversation
A sure-fire sign of flirting, this also means she is not the shy type. Warning: Now that you have her attention, don’t blow it by not knowing how to keep a conversation going strong.

Sign of Flirting #6:
She gives you a compliment
Since deep down most men are really insecure cravers of attention , women interested in dating would do much better if they threw more compliments a guy’s way.

Sign of Flirting #7:
She shows other positive body language signs
Boy language is a powerful tool women use when flirting with a man, and most know how to use this flirting sign to their advantage. Social scientists tell us 97% of communication is nonverbal in nature, so it’s very important for a guy to catch some of these signs of flirting:
  • twirling a finger through her hair as she looks your way

  • winking

  • discreet touching of your arm or knee

  • moving and leaning toward you when speaking

  • uncrossed arms and legs when facing you in conversation.

Overall, learning the above signs of flirting is only the first step toward successful dating. The next step includes facing any fears you may have about actually reaching out and asking the single girl out.


Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Conversation Starter

Having good conversation starter skills are key to any successful dating or marriage relationship. Have you ever seen a dating couple enjoying a great conversation? You can just see and feel those sparks flying all over the place! Learning how to have good conversations with your potential soul mate will not only help you both grow closer, but will also make for a much more enjoyable dating experience.
Yet, how many of us seem at a loss when we try to start a conversation? Later on, we kick ourselves for not saying that funny thing or timely word. Duh! However, if you put into practice the following conversation starter tips for dating, you are on your way to succeeding in the future.

Conversation Starter Advice

Conversation Starter Tip 1: Don’t Hog the Ball!

We all hated that when we were kids, and as single adults we hate it when someone hogs a conversation. Remember, a good conversation starts with a dialogue, not a monologue. That means allowing your date to get in some of his or her thoughts as well.

Ever meet a person who asks you how you are doing, but then before you can open your mouth they spend the next 10 minutes droning on about their stuff? The bottom line is it’s boring and annoying all rolled into one, so don’t do it, okay? :)

Conversation Starter Tip 2: Show an Interest in Their Passion

Everyone enjoys speaking about themselves and their interests. So discover what your boyfriend or girlfriend is passionate about, and ask them sincere, open ended questions about the topic. You will see your date come alive, and a nice and easy flowing conversation will ensue. You may also find out something interesting and surprising about your single friend that you didn’t already know.

Conversation Starter Tip 3: Be Prepared with Topics

Think about some interesting topics to discuss from daily events, news or funny things that have happened to you recently. Just remember to avoid boring or controversial topics, like talking incessantly about the ex-girlfreind or boyfriend. This happens to be the number one complaint singles give about their dating partners.

Conversation Starter Tip 4: Give Them Undivided Attention

When you are having a conversation with your friend, make sure you concentrate solely on them. Look intently into their eyes while they are speaking. This not only makes them feel important, but will give them the impression that you really do care about what they are saying. And you do, right?

Conversation Starter Tip 5: Be Vulnerable

It’s hard to start a conversation with an overly guarded person. Hanging out with such a person is also a huge turnoff. Hey, we’re not saying you should be giving away your bank account number to strangers, but opening up your heart a little bit by sharing your feelings helps the other person relax, and makes them open to sharing as well.

Conversation Starter Tip 6: Understand Body Language

Did you know that 93% of communication is non-verbal? So when you are starting a conversation with your date, take cues from their body language to assess if you are communicating well.

Good signs to look for when having a conversation: Leaning forward to you, dilated pupils, revealing palms and wrists, smiling, or uncrossed arms and legs. As you might have guessed, a dating tipoff that your conversation is not going well would include: folded arms and/or legs, rolling eyes, smirks, yawns, leaning back and looking away from your eye contact. A smart communicator will gauge body language, and adjust their conversation accordingly.

I’m sure there are many other conversation starter tips we haven’t shared. Feel free to share and help others if you have any other conversation dating tips.

Thursday, October 8, 2009


1.Read Each One Carefully & Think About It a Second or Two

2. No man or woman is worth your tears, & the one who is, won't make you cry.

3. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

4. A
true friend is someone who reaches for your hand & touches your heart.

5. The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can' t have them

6. Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.

7. To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.

8. Don't waste your time on someone, who isn't willing to waste their time on you.

9. Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be grateful.

10. Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened.

11. There's always going to be people that hurt you so what you have to do is keep on trusting & just be more careful about who you trust next time around...

12. Make yourself a better person & know who you are before you try & know someone else & expect them to know you.

13. Don't try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to.


author unknown

Monday, October 5, 2009

Tips for the Single Again Christian

Single Again Tip #1: Guard Your Heart

Recently single-again women and men have a void in

their lives that cries out for filling. They are also not thinking clearly. Additionally, they are especially open to making bad dating decisions, falling prey to sexual impurity and/or emotional “predators” The Bible warns us, “Above all else, guard you heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” (Proverbs 4:23)

The very last thing a recently single-again person needs during this time is to be taken advantage of sexually and/or have her or his heart broken all over again. That’s why most Christian and secular counselors recommend a time of up to one year after becoming single again that people not date. A single Christian parent dating with kids should be especially careful, since it’s not only their lives they are effecting, but the little ones’ as well.

Single Again Tip #2: Guard Your Wallet

Most recently single-again women (and to a lesser extent, men) have great anxiety and fear about how they will make ends meet. For Christian single parents, both custodial and non-custodial, financial stress over child support can also loom l


Let’s face it, when under financial stress, it’s easy for anybody to panic, and seek out quick fixes that can to can turn out badly. A clear mind with sound financial planning and budgeting can help at this time.

In this regard online help is available at Crown Financial Ministries. This international Christian organization offers free help on budgeting, with savings tips and internet radio broadcasts that recently single-again Christians would find helpful.

Single Again Tip #3: Guard Your Spirit

Becoming single again is a stressful thing because of the uncertainty and added responsibilities. Singles of all sorts would definitely benefit by reading some tips on how to reduce stress in their lives.

Also, since the recently single-again person can very easily feel isolated, plugging into a Christian singles support group where support , understanding and encouragement are offered would be beneficial toward the renewing of your spirit.