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Monday, January 12, 2009



Yes, I said it, in fact, I'll say it again, MASTURBATION! I figure if a few thousand of the millions here on Myspace or blog can expose their breast, proposition you for sex, have degrading music, and nakedness can have the audacity to request me as a friend , then I can say MASTURBATION and tell the truth about it! And given that many of you are doing it or have, let's talk about it. Since the majority of us have at least a 3rd grade education, I'll begin by defining what it is.

Masturbation: the excitation or erotic stimulation of one's own or another's genitals to achieve an orgasm by practices other than coitus/sexual intercourse, by instrumental manipulation, usually manually, occasionally by sexual fantasies or by various combinations of these agencies. Self-gratification, autoeroticism, self-abuse. From the Latin word masturbatus and manstupare, meaning to stir up, to defile oneself, to dishonor, to stupefy.

I have heard it said by many, especially by "Christians", that masturbation is not sex and even if you don't have a third grade education, you can clearly see that masturbation is sex. But many like to use that as an excuse to do it so that they can get a little sex without going "all the way". But whether you have sexual intercourse or sexually manipulate your own genitals to achieve an orgasm, you are having sex. The reason why you masturbate is to achieve an orgasm. And an orgasm is the culmination, the climax of any sexual act, whether it's with a partner(s) or sex with yourself. And that's exactly what masturbation is, solo sex.

Okay, now that we agree that masturbation is sex, then what is wrong with it? I'm glad you asked. For those of you who don't believe in God or live for Him, then this is not for you. But for those of us who not only "believe" in Him, but have actually made Him to be Lord, the One Who governs our lives, then I think it would be only fitting that we investigate what He has to say about it. In order to do that we have to go to God's Space, especially for those of you who say that masturbation is not in the Bible.

"Is it a good thing to have sexual relations? Certainly-but only within a certain context. It's good for a man to have a wife, and for a woman to have a husband. Sexual drives are strong, but marriage is strong enough to contain them and provide for a balanced and fulfilling sexual life in a world of sexual disorder."
You know what I love? The fact that God knows that sex is a good thing makes me want to stop typing and do a tap dance and a cartwheel! In fact, He's the One that created it! And it wasn't a mistake! He did it on purpose, as a gift for His children to enjoy! Imagine God before the foundation of the world, creating an orgasm?!!!!! My God, I feel a praise coming on!!! The sensation that many long to achieve was instituted, manufactured and conceived in the factory of God's mind. He knew the functionality of it, the mechanics of it, and the modus operandi. And God's method of operation for sex is marriage. He created the fibers of sex to be so strong that it could only be contained in the confines of marriage. What is marriage, that only It can contain the orgasm? Because only a contractual covenant can contain something so strong...Anything outside that method would self destruct. Any other orgasm achieved outside of marriage couldn't handle its intense, explosive, addictive, domineering, gripping force without repercussions. Yes, you could very well achieve and very much well, enjoy one, but not without suffering the impact of its climactic aftershocks. Yes, I just said it, Church! Yes, the tremors may feel good, but the aftermath, the consequences of an illegal orgasm is traumatic. You can reach the heights of sexual stimulation during masturbation, but can you handle its control over your life?
Masturbation is what I'd like to call, tormenting pleasure. The three second blissful orgasm achieved by masturbation is just as much tormenting as it is pleasurable. Because God never created solo sex. Masturbation often promises the pleasure but can never fulfill your inward void. And the many people that it has imprisoned by its non~threatening lure to satisfy your sexual desires, come to find that the trap is not worth the 3 seconds it took to get it. Trust me, I've been there, and I'd rather have cold, dry sheets than to fondle my self. Two things I've come to know about masturbation is this:

1. It brings shame,and...
2. It is addictive
Most people who have engaged in masturbation know that the culmination of this sexual act ends in shame. I don't have to share with you the thousands of emails of the admittance of this shame because you know all too well since you have experienced it yourself. Curled up in a fetal position, crying, because your bed is even more empty and you're lonelier than you did before you violated yourself...Because God never created sex so that you could gratify yourself. The dictionary defined masturbation as self abuse...the miss use of yourself. The mistreatment, the manipulation, the exploitation of YOU.
Self abuse from the 1605 Etymology dictionary says that it is self-deception, a synonym for masturbation or self pollution. The American Heritage Stedman's Medical Dictionary says it is the abuse of oneself or one's abilities.
And if that's not already agonizing, it's a never ending cycle that you habitually become dependant upon, like a drug. And like any other drug, you can never achieve the high you're looking for...Because MASTERbation will MASTER you! You enter into a contractual agreement with it and it will govern your life sexually. It will rule and control your life...it taps you on the shoulder 3 o'clock in the morning even when you don't want it. You want to stop but you can't. You cry, you repent and say you won't do it any more but you find yourself molesting yourself again...When will it ever end? I'm here to tell you that cold showers don't work and saying you won't do it anymore won't either. Because masturbation has become your MASTER. Its appetite is ferocious and it will not end until it dominates. It will live up to its definition and leave you stupefied! Its three second ecstasy will put you in a stupor and numb your faculties, your senses and sensibility...Your receptivity and emotional response. It will control your intellect, your reasoning, your judgment of things, and your own significance and leave you trapped in a mind full of warped sexual fantasies. It will overpower you, subdue and suppress you, hold you back, paralyze your forward movement and hinder you from walking in what God has for you. Is having sex with yourself even worth it?
I didn't think so...the only way to come out of the chains of masturbation is to dethrone its power by allowing God to become the MASTER over your sexual drive and appetites. In my book, Single, Saved, and Having Sex, I share with you the effective tools to finally master and conquer the addictive influence of masturbation. Your emails, prayer requests and cry for help over the last several weeks has captured God's attention . Because of that, I am offering my book not only at a deeply discounted price but I will autograph it and ship it to you the same day you order it. Because the torment of masturbation leaves your life TODAY! You will no longer have to be controlled by masturbation because you will now finally MASTER it!
If you are struggling with masturbation, it's time for you to get free! Freedom begins now!
Romans 8:37
Dr. Ty


NigerianDramaQueen said...

Woman! How art thee?
It has been such a long time. I admire you for daring to speak out on a subject that few would dare to tackle...
Happy New Year!

Mimi said...

WOW! I love your honesty, your boldness and hands-on-deck approach to things that people often shun. I am so adding you to my blog roll.

Lady A said...

@Mimi, I just hope it helps those in need of it. It's no different then drug, porn, alcohol addiction...samething. I just wish they would preach or bring more revelation on this subject in the church.

Favoured Girl said...

Wow, great post! Thanks for writing about it from a clear Godly perspective.

Anonymous said...

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Adam said...

Dear Lady A,

I greatly respect your desire to stay pure and encourage others to do so as well. But I would like to share with you another Christian perspective on masturbation.

While the Bible clearly forbids sex with another outside of the one man one woman lifelong covenant of marriage, at no time and in no place does it forbid sex with yourself. Click on my name, Adam, to visit a website that looks at Solo Sex from a positive Biblical perspective.

I have come to believe that for most Christians masturbation is a blessing and a gift from God.

Lady A said...

@Adam, thanks for your honesty. I totally understand where you are coming from because I too used to believe what you are saying. However, you must understand spiritual warfare. It's more to it then just manipulating the body. It's a spiritual act that open up other doors for the enemy that you don't see. It's deception. I did check your site. I appreciate your comment because you confirmed what the next post that the Lord has put on my heart to do. God doesn't want His people to be misinformed or deceived. Funny, how we can take a scripture and MAKE it work for what we want to do or justify. I personally have done it myself MANY times. I can take that same scripture Gal 5 and manipulate it and give it another meaning. Let me say this one thing, when you do this act of masturbation, your thoughts are unpure, unholy, and not clean. How is that HONORABLE to God when He instructs us to keep our heart and mind pure from sin? Case closed. Do you get me? You can't tell me that you are thinking about work, cutting the grass, doing church functions, or doing housework when you masturbate. You are indulging in lust which open up other doors for the enemy when you have an orgasm. Thanks again, brother for sharing! It just makes me more aware what the body of Christ needs. More intercession. Hopefully you will stay tuned for the next post. Whether if you may not receive it or not, you won't be able to say, 'I didn't know, or no one told me."

Adam said...

I shall indeed stay tuned for your next post. All either of us wants is to walk in a way that is well pleasing to the Lord we worship and serve.

Lady A said...

@Adam, hey there!! Hope all is well. I finally posed up the next post. I have one more to do, basically a recap and steps. However, allow the Lord to minister to your heart on this matter. You must hear from God yourself. Thanks for reading!!

Frank said...

what is your opinion for the married man who masturbates with his wife or with his wife on his mind?

Anonymous said...

masturbation is wrong. I struggle w/ masturbation myself. I struggled for years and failed over and over again.
I knew in my heart it's wrong but I didn't have the courage to fight it. IT's been two weeks now and I'm praying for strength and the will to fight the urge. . .that's actually the reason why im here.Masturbation takes a part of you every time. It's wrong and unholy.

Anonymous said...

Though I do not agree that masturbation is sex with yourself, it is most definitely a sin against yourself and the Lord. It is not sex because an orgasm itself does not equal sex. There have been many times where I've had dreams that were hardly sexual in nature but something in it triggered an orgasm and I woke up to my body orgasming. Since there'd been no one touching me, the simple act of orgasming did not mean my dream and/or mind had sex with me. As a former porn addict, in order to justify this sin, I actually trained my mind to NOT have lustful thoughts during the act. To simply focus on the orgasm and nothing else. No sexual stimuli other than the act. But you know what? It is still wrong! Why? #1 because you are allowing your flesh to make your decision. There is no spirit-man say in it other than the feeling inside you that you should rely on God to resist this temptation. Paul tells us that each of us should learn to control our own bodies. It should not tell us what to do, The Holy Spirit inside us should. We don't just eat whatever we want or sleep all day just because our bodies crave food or laziness, so why should we allow our bodies to tell us we should feed its craving for sexual satisfaction? #2 it harms your relationship with the Lord and yourself, because yes, it does bring shame. If no one told you it was wrong, you would still feel shame. And shame makes us hide our face from God. Adam and Eve proved that! God wants to be our source, not something we hide from because we failed or keep putting something before Him. And the shame pours over to us, because we now have a secret struggle we'd rarely tell our best friend about, for fear they think we were as weak as we already see ourselves as. God is our strength! Let us rely on Him to get us through the tough moments of temptation, and when your flesh is hungry, feed your spirit-man!