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Saturday, September 6, 2008

To All Women

I often warn women who are contemplating marriage to marry someone who can take care of them. When a woman marries, it ought to be to someone who is capable of taking her to the next level. If she comes from poverty, there is no reason for her to get married and still be impoverished. The role of the man is to take her to another place. When she gets married, she ought to dress better, drive better, live better, and eat better, not constantly be in a struggle over where her next meal is coming from. My grandmother used to say, 'I can do bad all by myself'. For a woman desiring a mate, the objective, of course, would be to find a Christian man, who's settled, has goals, accomplishments and a job. But a goal-oriented and focused man can't just be approached any kind of way. So the woman who seeks this type of stability must make sure that he stands out above the crowd:

1. Make sure your relationship with the Lord is strong and growing.

2. Make sure that you are presentable. Working from the inside out, your presentation should be representative of both who you are and whom you seek. Appearance is a reflection of how you see yourself.

3. Have the ability to hold an intelligent conversation.

4. And most importantly, allow the Holy Ghost to take control. You don't need to go after him. He's going to come after you, because after he sees and smells you and knows that you're in his presence, he's going to want to know who you are!

I know there's somebody reading this who has been chasing after the 'man of your dreams,' but God says, 'Just sits till and allow patience to have her perfect work through Me.' Furthermore, it's never a good idea to be too forward and too aggressive. Attempting to win a man's affection by jumping into bed with him will only backfire and cause him to lose interest in ever developing a lasting relationship. It causes him to lose respect for you and question your character. However, if he sees that you are dressed with quality, that you smell like you are somebody, that you look like you're doing fine without him, then that will attract the right attention from him. He'll have no choice but to give you his attention. Stop looking so needy, climbing into bed, trying in vain to capture a man's heart. God woke me up in the middle of the night and said, 'The same thing that Naomi told Ruth to do is the same thing that I want them to do for me.'God is so sick of saints coming to Him trying to get a quickie and never romancing Him for Who he is - going to church screaming, shouting and hollering, but hadn't been intimate with God all week long! Stop trying to treat God like a sugar daddy and start romancing Him with worship and praise: 'I'm yours Lord...everything I've got...everything I'm not!' The God we serve, which is the God of love, demands and requires of us foreplay before He gives us what we need. In the book of Ruth, the mother-in-law tells Ruth, 'You have to wash.' John 15:3 reminds us, Now ye are clean through the word which I have spoken unto you. When you sit in the Gospel of Jesus Christ, you are taking a shower. When you hear the unadulterated Word of God, then the dirt and grime that you've accumulated all week long begins to wash off of you.Ask God to 'create in you a clean heart and renew a right spirit.' Stand in the word. Then wait upon the Lord to renew your strength. Pass this on to those who have found or are seeking Mr. Right. This message is not directed at the receiver, it is directed to women I know that touch other young women that can benefit from this information. We are to be Naomi's of the world today. Our young women need to be informed of how to catch and keep a man that will respect them.

P.S. Pass this on to every woman you know!

Author: Pastor Jamal Harrison-Bryant


NigerianDramaQueen said...

I love love love love your blog!
While I do agree that a woman should marry someone who can take care of her, I also believe that a woman should be able to support herself financially when she gets married.
It is so true that the way we dress in a reflection of the way we see ourselves.
Good stuff Lady A!

Anonymous said...

OMG firrsssttt!!!

I have learned a valueable lesson here....

Lady A said...

Yes, Kin'shar was first everyone!
@Kin'shar, yeah, I believe we all have learned valuable lesson from it. I just wish someone told me 13yrs ago. Then chances are I wouldn't have settled, I would have went for the CREAM!!!!!

@Queen, I'm glad you enjoyed the gist. Even though I'm married, I still learned from it.

Anonymous said...

had to come back and follow you girl....still looking good.

How are you?

nicole marie said...

Great post Lady A! Being a "lady in waiting" is a tough position these days but it's one that God has called us to in our jobs, our relationships, and with our family.

Lady A said...

Thank you, I am touched.
@Nicole Marie, remember, you can do all things through Christ that strenghens you. All things are possible with Christ.

Fanwest said...

This post hit the nail on the head, on how to wait for him patiently... Thanks