Take A Risk A Day (But Be No Fool)

Loving someone is risky business. Taking risks is scary because we are not absolutely sure what the outcome will be . There are, you may argue, so many ways to get hurt in relationships with men or women, and you may wonder "why in the world would I heighten the chances by taking any risks on purpose?" In loving, the failure to take calculated risks provides you a sense of safety and security. Too much safety and security keeps things the way they are-the boring, stagnant status quo-no growth, no progress, no change. It's a safe way to live, and it's a sorry way too.

Taking a risk a day involves stretching your limits, testing the possibilities, and walking through your fears. It's making wise choices about what the next courageous move is for you to make in a loving relationship with your partner. It involves a willingness to put up something dear to yourself (like your time, your feelings, your insecurities, your ego) for a possible loss, or for the sake of great potential gain.

In your case, it may be as simple as mustering up the courage to speak to her or him where you've previously been silent. Or as complex as making a decision in your relationship that is as much from your heart as from your head. Risk-taking means daily taking another courageous step toward the kind of love-and lover-that you truly desire.

Risk-taking doesn't mean going for reckless, impulsive leaps off of love's diving board. That's being foolish and self-defeating. Rather, I am challenging you to "show up for your life," and cast off your procrastination and obsessive self-protection to do what feels right-if only you weren't so safe, secure, and terrified.

• Take the risk of letting some man see who you really are, behind the mask, and under your layers of protection.


• Take the risk of going for your first choice, rather than settling for your second, or third, or fourth...


• Take the risk of living as if what other people think about you is their business, and not yours at all.


• Take the risk of saying, "Yes. I think I will. I'm worth it." Or, "No more. I won't. I'm worth more than this."

The beauty of risk-taking is that some of your risks will return to you far more than you invested. Others may flop and go absolutely nowhere. Whichever the case, by taking the risk you will have strengthened your courage muscles just a little bit more.

Say it: "Too much safety and security can seduce me into stagnation. Stagnation is unacceptable to me. I want to reap the rewards that can only be mine by taking some wise risk today."

Do it: What is one necessary risk you must take to establish or enhance your relationship with the person you desire or already have? What is one risk-taking "baby step" that you would take today, if only you weren't afraid?Take that step today anyway.---Ronn Elmore